How to Avoid Those Awkward Moments

Never tell your lover about your STD
before putting on your shoes / never
give the finger to the tailgater who
follows you home only to pull into

the drive next door / never tell your
sergeant you lusted for him before
your discharge papers are in your hand /
never threaten to punch out your

mechanic over the bill until you
make sure the car starts and he didn't
box Golden Gloves / never call your
mother a ballbreaker and slam

the door as you leave before confirming
the Uber driver is in the driveway /
never read your BFF the CNF you wrote
based on her troubles with romance

while she is driving you to the airport
for a flight that will be cancelled /
never confess to your moribund father
you were the one who stole and wrecked

his T-Bird just before his miraculous
recovery / never share your poems
with a new girlfriend if all your poems
are about failed relationships

and how you burn for revenge /
and finally, never outlast your audience.

Tom Barlow is a widely-published Ohio author of poetry and fiction. He writes because conversation requires a great deal of give and take and he's always considered himself more of a giver. See more at tombarlowauthor.com.