he hesitates on the peak of mt moriah

i am no kierkegaard
                  knight of faith. i am no abraham

exordia, beautiful murderous exegesis
i have fucked and kneeled in share

                  of agnostic days.

but dear god—

                                    a thousand miles away
an expanding space

what do we talk about
what is there to do, the furniture ours

and not ours? i am begging
                  begging in this infinitesimal piety

faith in her return, that the three days and nights
                                    slaking devotion
                  and knife to the throat of what could be mine
could have been mine
                  it would not have been better—

i believe it would not

isaac
                  a blind heat raw seized
in the miracle of an idolater please

i must believe
i cannot
it would not have been better

Byron Xu is an Chinese-American writer studying at the University of Texas at Austin. His works are published or forthcoming in The Florida Review, The Hunger, Lammergeier, Indicia, and elsewhere.