DW093: Lewd Acts Black Eye Blues

a list of things that aren’t gutting me recently
would be easier--I left my car window open for the rain

everything gets wrecked no matter
how hard you try, why not make that the goal

only drawn to hands with the capability
to clench, && i can tell you don’t have it in you

my lewd acts are escalating-- i’m old enough
to start understanding the whispers in my brain

as a kid playing lions, the most intimate act
watching the other pretend to pee-- the first girl

who called me creative in bed when i pulled her
into my lap-- old enough now that these things don’t scare me

i can look someone in the eye who turns their twinkling
intent at me--old enough to shy away

or engage-- old enough to let my body beg
even when you don’t know what i’m asking

it’s all run away with me--it’s all i see
in the grocery aisle at target, the young stud

and his brood, their shopping cart, the plump front
of his pregnant partner & their string of small animals

the way we play as if we’re them--is there anything more fun
than lewd acts? but all of this is stuck up in my brain

&& i’m that leaky hose again with a thumb stuck up
my spout--leave me alone unless i don’t want you to

come listen to the depth of my shame, how brutal it drags me
under & how i had one glimpse of purpose for my downcast eyes,

a sliver of permission to keep them there

Aly Pierce lives in Beverly, MA where she drinks coffee & mails you records from Deathwish Inc. Her debut collection The Visible Planets is available now from Game Over Books.